Yes, I'm one day late-- and i'm not talking about my period, I'm talking about the ritual that i have been doing on this blog of mine that didnt happen last year-- the yearly birthday post. Futile attempts of trying to remember the vague fragments of scenes from last year's hoopla and all I can remember are flashing neon lights and a night well spent at a karaoke box-- and oh, the start of my damaged hair life (to explain in one and yet a powerful word without exaggeration: B L E A C H ) . Nevertheless, a birthday spent with good food and good company is my kind of birthday celebration-- which is exactly what I did this year, exclude the bleaching and the karaoke part. I've been genuinely enjoying Tokyo life with my colleagues-- activities that all fall into one category which i call "THE DRUNK LIFE CATEGORY". Well, it's not exactly what you think it is... but it can also be. Its either just me getting drunk after drinking a bottle and a half of wine ( I can share the story, but if you've been to japan and you've seen drunk old japanese men then I'm no different-- except with one- a bit of poise, and by that, i mean knowing when and where exactly to vomit and two, I made it home) or getting mentally drunk and high in life (which i prefer). Its almost midnight and I already feel my bed calling me or maybe its just me feeling exhausted from work but now I'm really trying to think of how to finish this post-- so I'll just end this one by saying thank you like I do with all my birthday posts. Thank you to my readers for keeping up with all these bull that I had over the past few years. I deeply appreciate the love and support that you've given me not just as a blogger (even though i don't consider myself as one) , but as a person who constantly seeks adventure and a person with so many goals and ambitions. To you, my reader, I hope everything goes well for you. I hope through my posts, I was able to connect with you. I hope I was able to express my feelings with my good ol' stories-- even the sad ones. As promised, I won't give up on this only diary, let alone writing. A promise is a promise. I'll still be here. Always. 

Love, 

Ena 

Love always, Ena

I'm writing- or should i say typing this on my way home. Its already 11:24 in the evening and the traffic is still crazy. In the midst of all the craziness happening to this life of mine every now and then, I still happen to think about you and how you do, I just thought you should know. Its been months since I left home. It's also been months since the night we made a promise of having each other's backs and not letting go. Not letting go of mere old memories that used to make a huge impact to me back then-- all becoming vague and static now that I think of it. There's no one to blame for what happened. They say it's inevitable-- people coming in and out of your life, I guess I was just not ready to risk the friendship or neither risk you. I was more open and you were the mysterious type (one thing i loved about you) but as someone who never stops asking for answers from a guy who never really talked about what's going on in his head, I just couldn't help and wonder why. I wonder why you had to stop caring. I wonder why you just decided to start a new life-- a life without me.

I wonder why you had to let go. Whatever your reason is, I'm still here and I'm still willing to listen. Just let me try to understand you, one last time, whenever you're ready. Don't worry, I won't Iet go, I promise, I will remember you. The memories and how it all started-- and how it all went down. From how we became so close to how we became so distant. From pinky swears to broken promises. How it went from I will never forget you, to us acting like complete strangers and falling apart. This is not goodbye, this is a thank you. For loving me at some point in your life  and receiving my love in return. We could've had a picture together and this could have been a happy comeback post with your picture in it. But all things happen for a reason so I'm just wishing you good health and happiness. Happiness that you weren't able to find in me, hopefully wishing you find it in someone else if not within yourself.

Here are some pictures of what you missed out on. Take care always.